If you are reading this because it was shared to you by someone, you were forced by someone and/or you found this floating in the world wide web, I am warning you this early that this will be LOOOOONG BUT THIS (series) WILL BE WORTH IT! :)
I originally planned for this to be just ONE entry but when my fingers started typing, it was too late for me to realize that it was already too long and I haven't given the juiciest part yet! And so, this will be a SERIES! :)
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Money is one of the topics that is considered taboo in our culture. We will never have the guts to ask even our close friends questions related to money like, "How much do you earn?" , "How much savings do you have in the bank?" or even "How do you manage your money?". Consequently, our parents will try to the best of their abilities to shield us from any financial woes that they may be experiencing. Yes, we may feel that the cash flow is a bit tight because we don't go shopping every week anymore but they will never verbalize the problem for as long as they can. I am not saying that not talking about it is wrong and that we should go asking anyone we met about their financial status. In my opinion, that tense feeling and you-can-almost-hear-the-dropping-needle-because-it-is-so-quiet environment every time money pops up in the conversation is mainly due to the fact that we are so not used to talking about it therefore, we think it is impolite to talk about it.
I belong to the middle class and I earn relatively higher than others (mostly because I am an OFW thus I do not need to pay taxes in my home country). However, in my almost 29 years of existence and almost 8 years of working full time (including my 2 years and counting as an OFW), I was not very happy with the state of my finances when I started seriously looking into it a year ago. Don't get me wrong, I am not complaining nor asking for pity because like what I said, I am sure that I have more savings than some 29 year old people that I know. My unhappiness comes not from having "less" money but from having "less" money because of financial illiteracy. According to http://www.financialliteracy.gov.au/, financial literacy is about understanding money and finances and being able to confidently apply that knowledge to make effective decisions.
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I will share some personal things to give you an idea as to where I am coming / came from:
1) I am supporting my family. I am not saying this because I want to brag about it but because it is the truth. For the longest time that I am working, I spent bulk of what I earn to support my family. Looking back, I had no idea how I managed to do what I did. Praise God for His grace and provision.
2) It took me awhile to stop being an enabler. I first heard the term "enabler" when I was crying my heart out to a friend because I felt that I am already being financially and emotionally "abused" and he (that's the beauty of having guy friends, they give you direct to the point responses!) said that maybe it already became a cycle because I am an enabler. Meaning, in one way or another, I enabled them to be so dependent on me.
3) I started learning how to set boundaries. This proved to be very useful. It was hard at first because I was so used to giving in to their requests. I used to say generous but now I realized that it was not generosity, it was partly being an enabler and partly being stupid :D Because of my "generosity", my problem with credit card also started around this time.
4) I experienced receiving "calls" from a credit company because of my late/non payments. This credit card company called me 2-3 times only at my work place but I did not want to deal with that kind of stress (and shame) so I paid my credit card in full and asked them to close the account! That was when I learn to be scared with the misuse of credit cards because I experienced it first hand. Their calls at my work place was so horrific (and they were not even harassing me yet!) that I do not want to experience them again EVER.
5) I left my previous work in Manila (a few months before I flew to Jakarta) with negative finances. Yes, negative! Meaning, I had no savings in the bank and worse, I even left debt in my previous employer. I had no idea exactly as to how that happened but I am suspecting that the culprits were as stated above in (1) and and my love for travel. I was so blessed to have friends and family who helped me with my negative finances particularly because I am flying to a foreign country without any money in my pocket!
How did I survive?! What happened?! I will let you know anytime in the series (kung san ko maisipang isingit! hahaha!)
I do not regret the experiences I mentioned above because the lessons that I learned from them made me who I am today. I am surprised that those things happened to me but more importantly, the fact that I was able to weather the storm was a clear testament of God's providence.
My "enlightenment" about the state of my finances did not stop just from realizing that I've messed up (thank God!) but I started to educate myself about how to properly manage my finances. Contrary to what most people believe, my old self included, managing one's finances is not only for rich people. We should ALL learn and educate ourselves on how to manage our finances well.
These are the things that I did (and some of them, I am still doing) to educate myself and "untangle" my messed-up finances:
1) I started buying and reading books about money / managing finances. Those "business and/or finances" aisles in the bookstore that my old self NEVER visited are now my must-visit aisles. I do not feel guilty when buying books because I refer to books as my "personal investments". I also do not feel bored when reading books about money anymore :D Like what they said, you need to attract what you want to happen in your life.
PS: If an e-book works for you, then that is fine. I personally prefer investing on hardcopies because I am envisioning that these books will be placed in my future library for my future kids to read and learn from :)
2) Research, research and research. I did not only invest on books but I also invested time in researching particularly reading blogs that are very generous in discussing money matters. Try to google and you will be surprised to know that there are a lot of blogs in the web that are very generous with information. But of course, do not believe everything that you read. Remember to cross-reference (are all your references saying the same thing or is he the only one saying otherwise?) and that most scenarios are case-to-case basis.
3) Set reasonable goals. When I say reasonable, do not put 99% of your monthly salary as your target savings for the month. Yes, let us dream big but let us not forget that we cannot change things overnight. Just like a baby learning how to work for the first time, we need to take baby steps first. Just to let you know, I failed miserably the first year because I set too high expectations! But I am moving forward now :)
4) Start with what you can. When Alex and I discussed the state of our finances, we talked about where to start given the money that we have. I am very lucky that Alex is financially literate and continues to educate himself about handling finances.
So there you go, you now know how financially messed up I was (buti na lang past tense na! naks!)
Coming Up: very good tips I got from the book I've read
PS: This post was just "parked" in my draft folder since September 7 :)
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